国外也有段子手：我想和妹子一起看球！

亲爱的小伙伴们，本期“国外也有段子手”又跟大家见面啦！本周各大联赛看点多多，你的主队赢球了吗？今天，还是意义非凡的“女生节”，有木有妹子和你一起看球呀？嘿嘿，还是让小编陪你走进今天的故事吧~

【梅西勺子点球，巴萨大胜埃瓦尔】

Juicestation(热刺球迷)：穆尼尔都特么在联赛进了7个球了，可我依然没有女朋友…(Munir had already scored 7 goals in La Liga, but I still don’t have a girl friend.)

TheCheeks(巴萨球迷)：我常常会幻想着，有天能和我最心爱的人一起去看巴塞罗那的比赛。现在，经过辛苦地攒钱，我终于把电视买了，就差个女朋友了。(I always dreamt of watching a Barca’s game with my girlfriend. Now after hard work I finally bought a TV set and what I need now is a girl.)

MathiasKokkers(阿根廷球迷)：TMD梅西，早早地踢勺子点球不就完了吗？CTMD！(Messi should kick a f**king 'spooned' penalty every time, lol)

Gallivante(巴萨球迷)：护住球，穿裆过人，射门得分——标准的苏亚雷斯式进球。(Shield the ball ?, Nutmeg someone ?, Score a goal ?, Classic Suarez.)

Gurtejgp(巴萨球迷)：水爷看了会沉默，戈丁看了会流泪，不转不是路易斯。(This one reminds of the goals of Suarez against RM, Atletico and PSG, these are my favorites)

(图)自从加盟巴萨，小马哥只进过乌龙球……

Dylan80(皇家社会球迷)：布叔的麒麟臂让我高潮迭起~~~(Steroid arm from Bravo there make my orgasm explosive)

【C罗大四喜，皇马7-1塞尔塔】

Aru10(尤文图斯球迷)：一记远射，一粒头球，一粒直接任意球和一粒轻巧推射——完整的C罗式进球装备包。(A Long Shot, an Header, a FK and a Tap-In, the complete CR7 Package.)

Infinite_Ota(未知主队球迷)：C罗知道该如何让质疑者们闭嘴。(Ronaldo knows how to make the haters silent.)

TridentPls(未知主队球迷)：马塞洛终于明白7-1胜利是什么滋味了…(Marcelo finally knows what a 7-1 feels like.)

ForgetHype(秘鲁球迷)：C罗到底要进多少球，他的儿子才会看上一眼？(How many goals does Ronaldo have to score for his son to give a fuck?)

GodFearing(曼联球迷)：迷你罗早就在他家后院看见太多比这更精彩的进球了。(He has seen more impressive goals in his backyard.)

CantGetEnuf(罗马球迷)：皇马这7-1到底想表达什么意思？还让不让我狼好好地去伯纳乌踢球了……(Did RM win 7-1 to send a message to us? Cuz we got it loud and clear…)

【精彩不断，北伦敦德比收获平局】

Pocop(阿森纳球迷)：幸吾之未负，喜刺之丢分。为所憾者，乃吾厂四轮不胜，联赛掉队，何其惜哉！榜首浮名奈若何，唯有疏狂图一醉。(I'm happy we didn't lose. I'm happy spurs didn't win. I'm salty we didn't win. This loss of points was unnecessary. In the end, I'm salty. I need a strong drink now.)

Mrleebob(利物浦球迷)：这周，阿森纳和热刺打平，曼城还输了球，究竟是哪个上帝在保佑拉涅利？(Arsenal and Tottenham draw after both teams and Man City lose midweek. To which God is Ranieri praying?)

【扩大优势，莱斯特城领跑积分榜】

rossco9(曼联球迷)：取胜之后，狐狸城已经领先第二位的热刺5分，领先第三位的阿森纳8分，联赛只剩下9轮啦！(So a Leicester win this afternoon puts them 5 clear of Spurs, 8 clear of Arsenal with 9 matches left.)

eueste 2(普雷斯顿球迷)：我有幸见证了这个时代，上次让我感到如此震惊的还是2004年欧洲杯夺冠的希腊国家队。(What a time to be alive. Last time I felt like this was when Greece won the European Championship.

KojimaForever(伯恩茅斯球迷)：现在，莱斯特城已经提前保级成功了，接下来的比赛就已经是为了乐趣而踢球了吧？(They're now guaranteed not to be relegated, they're playing these games for fun.)

Django_7 (巴萨球迷)：我今天没看德甲的拜仁多特之战，反而看了沃特福德和莱斯特城的比赛，要是去年我这么做，那我一定是脑子被门挤了。(So today i watched Watford vs Leicester City instead of Bayern vs Dortmund, a year ago i would laugh my ass of if someone told me this was gonna happen.)

【马塔染红，曼联兵败西布朗】

TomShoe (曼联球迷)：前几场比赛我们打得并不正常，好在现在我魔又回到了最熟悉的轨道上。(Glad to see the team I support return to form after a brief spell of upsets in recent games.)

Bambinoquin(曼城球迷) 范加尔：小瓜，为了让你下赛季还能打欧冠，做师傅的只能帮你到这了！(LVG made his best to assure Pep’s Champions League next season.)

fishueb(佛罗伦萨球迷)：你们考虑过穆里尼奥的感受么…打欧联的曼联他不去，瓜穆注定无缘在曼彻斯特团圆…(It’s really bad news for Mourinho, he might not coach a team in Europa League and the two top-class managers could’t meet together in Manchester.)

(图)要不...咱俩一块过个节？

好了，本期“国外也有段子手”就为大家播报到这了，祝各位小伙伴们早日找到另一半哦，让我们下期不见不散，摸摸大~

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